São Paulo, domingo, 15 de janeiro de 1995 |
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Paula Becker to Clara Westhoff
ADRIENNE RICH
I couldn't paint or speak or even move. My child –I think– survived me. But what was funny in the dream was, Rainer had written my requiem– a long, beautiful poem, and calling me his friend. I was your friend but in the dream you didn't say a word. In the dream his poem was like a letter to someone who has no right to be there but must be treated gently, like a guest who comes on the wrong day. Clara, why don't I /dream of you? That photo of the two of us –I have it still, you and I looking hard into each other and my painting behind us. How we used to work side by side! And how I've worked since then trying to create according to our plan that we'd bring, against all odds, our full power to every subject. Hold back nothing because we were women. Clara, our strength still lies in the things we used to talk about: how life and death take one another's hands, the struggle for truth, our old pledge against guilt. And now I feel dawn and the coming day. I love waking in my studio, seeing my pictures come alive in the light. Sometimes I feel it is myself that kicks inside me, myself I must give suck to, love... I wish we could have done this for each other all our lives, but we can't... They say a pregnant woman dreams of her own death. But life and death take one another's hands. Clara, I feel so full of work, the life I see ahead, and love for you, who of all people however badly I say this will hear all I say and cannot say. (1975-1976) Texto Anterior: Paula Becker a Clara Westhoff Próximo Texto: O amor nos tempos da Aids Índice |
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